-100926
Posted on: Sunday, September 26 @ 10:38 PM
Yosu!!~
Hey Guys.
Now. There are a lot of things going through my brain. My very retarded brain. T^T
<,,< I don't get it but i understand why. I get it but I dont understand why.
You see how this is retarded. T^T <,,,,< Gah.
My brain hurts. We went through the red light. T^T
I was intimidated.
I stayed calm for as long as I could.
I got fustrated.
I don't know what to say.
I miss you.
I wish you could see it from my view.
I wish I could see it from your view.
I wish I could make it better.
I wish I could make us better.
I wish I could regain it.
I wish I got the right answers.
I wish I could do things right.
I am sorry.
I want you.
I want to hug you.
I want to make things better.
I want to be there for you.
I want to be for you.
I want to make you happy forever.
I want to stop hurting you.
I love you.
I shall go.
Byebye.
Poo.
-100920
Posted on: Monday, September 20 @ 10:53 PM
Yosu!!~Hey Guys.
So today, Danielle and I made up?
I guess. A lot of arguing. As you can see. The past few days.
But today, we tried hard not to argue. xDD
It worked.
So Danielle wanted me to go over to her house. She asked me last night.
So at 6:45 am, I woke up. Just like that. Exactly 6:45 and no alarm or anything, it was so cool. So my mum was making coffee for her beloved husband, and herself, and I asked if i could go to Danielle's house, and she said mmkay gab can take you on the way out.
I was like YES.
Then I went back to sleep.
So i slept tell 8 45 ish. in between 645 and 845 gab was kinda like talking to me, and i was syncing my ipod. i left my comp on.
I'M SO SORRY I LIED TO YOU GAB! T^T I told him that there was an outing, and when he picked me up at 6 ish pm, he was like there was no outing was there, i was like YES THERE WAS. T^T Sorry. I hate losing arguments. Dx
Yeah, so while i was at Danielle's house, we:
I got there and we slept in bed. T^T my feet were cold as, her feet were warm. xDD Yeah. So afterwards 2 hours past. during that time Breakfast was eaten, and the rest is up to your imagination. then we ordered pizza online. xDD
We were originally going to get dominos because they were clsoe, but as we were deciding pizzas, we were like , dominos suck balls, lets order eagle boys. xDD
So we did, it was $3 Cheaper. xDD YEAHH and they're Australian. YEAHHHH xDD
And their pizzas are bigger. xDDDD
YES
mmksy, so then we played wii after. xDD
I tried the game I bought her, Wario Smooth Moves. IT was pretty fun. Bad thing we couldnt get multiplayer. T^T
But then we played Sport Tennis. xDD FUNN ASSSSS
xDD Maybe because I like tennis. xDD Yeah.
Apparently I was realy into the game. -Shifty- xDD
Anyways, OH OH OH OH OH I FORGOT
THE ICE CREAM TRUCK CAME. ZOMG
ZOMG
ZOMG
WE BOUGHT ICE CREAM FROM THE GUY. HE WAS NICE. XDDDDD
AND WE META NEIGHBOUR. HE WAS NICE TOO.
YEAH YEAH YEAH. I FELT SO GROWN UP. BUYING PIZZA, BUYING ICE CREAM. ZOMG. YES. YUM. YEAH. ZOMG. YEAH. EORAERG;BAEGR
xDDD
TOMORROW, DANIELLE IS COMING OVER. I LOVE IT. YES. xDD
Yeah. I need to tell my mum tomorrow, in the morning. xDD
So yeah guys, How was your day? Blog about it. xDD Lemme READ.
So I'm listening to High School Never Ends -By Bowling for Soup
Yeah. xDD
So
I shall go.
Byebye.
Poo.
-100919
Posted on: Sunday, September 19 @ 7:08 PM
Yosu!!~My thoat is sore. My lips have cold sores. I have the massivest ulccer. My head aches. My stomach is upset. My body knows that it's lacking you. You're the life in my life. Without you, my body is dying. My mind is empty.
When you stopped watering,
the bloom started withering.
No matter how much you wanted it back,
the love and care was what it lacked.
Why did you not cherish it when it was alive,
now it has no chance to survive.
You made me count the days we were together,
for they were easier to count than the days we didnt see each other.
I try my best to bloom for you,
but you tell me that my bloom lacks,
the beauty, I've been falsely accused,
of a love I didnt give back.
You say you'd pet me everyday
only to yell at me in my face.
I try a different way,
only to make you more pissed and angry.
You run up behind and you give me a hug,
I greet you with hope but you think I shrug.
You let go of me and say I dont care,
you think from my view that this is fair?
That I come to greet you again,
but you say my face is not sincere and then,
you run away crying in pain.
I try my best to make amendments,
but do you care that I made then for you?
For you take out my misjudgments,
and used it to make me feel poo.
I try to make it right for you
and do you see what i've done
for is it right for you?
I love you. I hate arguments.
I feel the answer to your question coming.
I'm hurt but, I guess. I have to do it.
I'm still not sure. I dont know. GAH
T^T
Poo.
-100917
Posted on: Saturday, September 18 @ 12:27 AM
Yosu!!~Hey. Guys.
Everyday. We get good. Then straight away we argue.
I'm so sick of arguing.
You don't stop to think that, yes, I have made a major mistake. And you're never going to forgive me. You're never going to get over it. You're never going to see thorugh the problem. You're just going to leave it there and keep looking back at it, so you may get fustrated once again.
You said I dont hug you like I used to. I hug you more. And you say I hug you weirdly. You ask me to hug you tighter, and I hug you tighter, and you say I hug you too tight.
I wanted you to be happy with youself. You can say you're happy with yourself, but you dont feel it.
Everytime we argue, you go back to something. The mistake I made. Yes. I did things I should not have done. Caused more pain for everyone.
You dont see that when I see you smile, I feel happy too. When you feel good, I feel good too? When you stop thinking you're too fat, you're not pretty, you're not good looking, just for a while, I'm happy. I want you to be greatful the way you are.
You keep referring to her. You don't understand that I've tried really hard to fix that. Do you. I've caused you a lot of pain, I know. I've tried.
The other night, you said 'Believe it or not, I have feelings too.'
I know you have feelings. If you didnt, then I'd be going crazy just to make a little emotion come out of you.
You think she is always on my mind. It's funny now lovers turn to sisters, and sisters turn into lovers.
We were never lovers. There was never a 'we'.
YOU and I have a we. But you're making it hard to maintain.
huh. Believe it or not, I've been trying to impress you. But you dont feel that. You feel that I dont care about you. I can do whatever I want. The things you do and the things I do should be kept to ourselves? mmkay.
You make your love for me seem like so much. I know you love me a lot. I love you heaps too. But when you say ' If it's even love.' No.
your feeligns arent for me
youre feelings are great too
they're just not in my direction
Huh.
heartless jerk
freaken flirt
you have no feelings towards me now
Great. And to think that we're still together.
Tell me, does this sound like the talk from a person who is apparently your girlfriend?
oh right,
We've broken up.
318 Days.
ADroonie.
I'm so sorry.
-100916
Posted on: Thursday, September 16 @ 4:47 PM
Yosu!!~
Hey guys.
I'm so blind. I didn't even notice. You were always there for me. And I abused it. Why did I let my self become like this. How did i let myself become like this. I didn't mean to do this. I'm so sorry. But I'll make it up to you. Both of you.
When it died, I pushed her away. I got closer to you. I told you everything. I knew that we were close, bother-sister close. Thank-you for being there. We talked. We shared. You listened to me as I rambled on. I'm so sorry that you had to go through all that.
When it came back to life, she was scared what we had was going to kill it again. Like I was poison. But it wasnt. You helped me. You helped me think through it clearer. To understand things, I, as a guy wouldnt see. But because she didnt like what we had she didnt like you. And this is when i made the mistake.
I started to push you away.
I tried to make it so we wouldnt have anything. I've succeeded. I didnt mean to hurt you. Both of you. I called you names. I made you feel bad. I'm sorry. I didnt mean to hurt you this bad. I didnt mean to hurt you.
You started to hate your best friend, because I was close to her. I didnt mean for this to happen. But today I assume that you and her made up. You two shouldnt let me get between your friendship.
One of the reasons I was mean to you, because I felt that I wasnt needed. You had him. Business. You would talk to him. Be with him. I didnt feel like I fit in your picture. Someone else likes him. He's always sitting with you. You know I dont like him. The looks he gives me. I smile and wave at him. What does he do? He looks at me, and continues to walk. When we first met, I could tell what type of personality he had. The type that makes you feel like you're less than him. Not you. But me. He'd boast about the stuff he has. Everything. Like he's trying to impress you. But then, he'd joke and be like I cant afford it. I'm not rich. Ha ha. After he's gone on about where he lives. what he owns. I don't like it. I tried to be nice to him and he just brushed me off. Until now, I still try to be nice to him.
But you became close to him. You'd be with him. Like I was of no use. So I backed off, and eventually, I became this person. I hate me. I want to change. I'm sorry. To you and her. To him, I want to make things right.
Like how I want to befriend Mitchell. I'm sorry Mitchell, for making bad impressions of you. and to you.
I'm sorry you, personally. I will talk to you. I will make things right again. I will stop being like this. I'm sorry. I didnt meant to hurt so many people. I'm so sorry. I hope I can make things right again.
Please, let me talk to you. I want to return to the brother you once had. I'm sorry I turned out this way.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry I was mean to you. I'm sorry I called you names. I didnt meanto hurt you. I want to be the one who supports you when you fall down again. I'm sorry I acted like this to you.
I love you. In a brotherly way.
I'm sorry for causing you so much pain. Thank-you for saying it. If not I wouldn't have known. Well, I would in some aspects but I wouldnt understand. I'm sorry.
HunnYeah. I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm so fustrated all the time. I take it out on everyone else. I should be taking it out on myself. I'm sorry I caused so much pain to everyone. I wish I could take all the pain I've caused from everyone. I love you.
Tuan. I'm sorry for making you fustrated at me. At PmN. I'm sorry that we ended up like this. I'm sorry I've made you support while i wasnt there. Because I'm not in the classes you and her have, you've had to go through it. Thanks for being there when I wasnt at my best.
Walter. I'm sorry for making your life miserable. I wish that I didnt make you feel crap. I am so sorry for making you go through that. You're a big man in a small body. I remember. I look up to you.
Simmon. I'm sorry for your losses. I'm sorry, I was one of the causes, once. I need you to be strong. Not that you arent already. I love you how you can maintain a smile on your face. I look up to you.
Dotter. I love you. I miss you. And I'm sorry for getting agro at you. I love your wise advice. I like it how we constantly support each other. I'm sorry for the time i was so mean to you. When I rejected your help. I'm sorry for making you angry.
I hope I can make it up to all of you. Rebuild the friendship. The family. The relationship. Me.
To you, I am sincerely sorry.